Jimmy’s Concussion

Me Knows Better Than to Say This… but I will. Jimmy may have had a concussion… though I am not sure. Don’t worry as everything is functioning… I think. Of course this happened three years ago so I really should know by now. It happened while I was waiting to make a left turn on a busy highway – speed limit 55 mph. I had to wait to let a long line of cars pass when a car of three inattentive teenagers raced up behind me. Luckily when I realized the approaching car would not be able to stop in time I had a few seconds to consider my options.


Most people would’ve said “Oh Shit…” but not Jimmy. The physics of the situation came under consideration as the equation mv1 = mv2 raced through my brain. It’s been a while since school, but the force of the equation calculates that mass and velocity of one vehicle creates a momentum equal to… oh - sorry about that – this isn’t a science lecture… I guess “Oh shit” is easier to understand as I then tried to accelerate my vehicle to minimize the impact.

The results: Three teenagers in the hospital, one with a broken leg and the force of the impact created a fire in their vehicle. Jimmy walked away with a large lump on the noggin minus a backend on the SUV.

Then it gets interesting. The EMT’s pulled Jimmy into the ambulance and started asking questions to see if he comprehended the events. After several questions, they were leaning toward an overnight observation in the hospital, to which Jimmy strenuously objected because he had a boat load of meetings the next day he had to attend.


Somehow I talked my way out of the hospital stay with the standard AMA (Against Medical Advice).  The EMT's said they would relent, but on one condition… Then in the exact words of the EMT he stated, “... only if you have your wife arouse you once every hour.”


Now Jimmy knows a good deal when he hears one, so I immediately scramble out of the ambulance knowing this would be a pretty good night. As I relayed the medical treatment to my wife, she considered the situation and then asked to see the documented proof before consenting to the advice of the not so brilliant EMT’s.


I guess Jimmy did have a concussion or I would never have left the ambulance without having that damn EMT write that treatment down.