Whoa… For A Second, Jimmy Thought…

Me Knows Better Than to Say This… but I will. Between my junior and senior year, my brother and I decided to spend the day at the amusement park (Valleyfair) with a group of our baseball buddies. During the day, my brother and I hooked up with a couple of hot girls (truthfully - it was a very warm day) and we went on a few rides with them. Everything was going very well and the girls wanted to go for a final spin on the Enterprise before spending a little casual time with us. At this point, the Enterprise was one of the most extreme rides in the park where the four person containment compartment moved in a circle until it gained enough speed and then the entire ride turned ninety degrees so that it looped like a Ferris Wheel. Only the riders were upside down for a good portion of it.

Like I said, everything was going well… very well. After we finished the ride, the four of us were standing in a circle deciding where we could hang out when my brother abruptly stopped talking and put his hand over his mouth. He paused for a second and then he announced for all to hear, “Whoa.” And as he tapped his chest he added, “That was close. For a second, I almost thought I was going to…” And before he could finish the sentence, he threw-up in the middle of the circle.

Instinctively both girls kicked their legs back to avoid the splash, but the angular velocity of the projectiles were a bit too much as they ricocheted onto their sandals and bare legs.


Not sure what happened next, but the girls mentioned they needed to go to the bathroom to clean up and needless to say, they didn’t come back. Way to go bro! Whoa, for a second, I almost thought we were going to get…

Jimmy Wants A Vanity License Plate

Me Knows Better Than to Say This… but I will. It seems like too many people have the urge to express themselves everywhere - including on cars. I don’t particularly care for bumper stickers… but that is just me and everyone has First Amendment rights. For me, they are too small to read, generally not in tune with my political beliefs and most look like they are the only valuable part still on the car – which might be the only thing holding the bumper on and hence the name. (Which gets me thinking that the Cash 4 Clunkers program was generally a good thing since it got many Obama bumper stickers off the road – either that or they had a change of heart. Maybe that was what all the Change hype was about). But me… I prefer the more subtle message - A Vanity Plate.




Jimmy has thought long and hard about this. Unfortunately I’m not sure anyone would get it so I need your opinion. What about this:

If you don't get it, read a little lower on the page and I will tell you what it is.





















When I come up from behind and you look in the rear view mirror what does it say?

The Answer: MOVE IT

Jimmy’s Fourth Rule for International Travel

Me Knows Better Than to Say This… but I will.  Sorry for the long time between blogs, but I have been traveling… I mean working.  I know the blog should come first, but Jimmy has to eat (bad choice of analogies here as you will read later).  However, the job does give me plenty of material to write about.  A few blogs ago I had “Three Rules for International Travel.”  See:  http://meknowsbetter.blogspot.com/2010/03/three-rules-for-international-travelers.html

Well today, I must amend this to a fourth one:  Eat First, Ask Questions Later.

The fourth rule must be strictly adhered to in Asia… particularly in China.  Jimmy really likes Chinese food (Americanized Chinese food that is as I have come to realize there is a distinct difference).  On a recent travel to Guangzhou, I was treated to a special dinner where the patrons select live food from tanks and it is prepared right away.  I have now come to appreciate mammals which walk on four legs and are found prepackaged at Cub Foods.   

Jimmy has also learned to eat more vegetables since at least those are recognizable food forms.  Not sure I have, or will ever acquire the taste yet for alligator, water beetles, sea urchins, snakes, or geoduck glams (whatever the heck those are, but they sure are ugly even when alive).

Remember besides:

1.      Any sleep is good sleep.  

2.      Whenever food is placed in front of you, it must be time to eat.  

3.      Start each and every day with a healthy breakfast because the day can only get better after eating that crap.

And now the latest rule:

            4.  Eat first, ask questions later.